It has been awhile since I played a higher rated player I think he was rated 1575 the highest rated player for me online this time this one I did not duck and run but I figured I'm playing well enough. From the get go I grabbed the lead but didn't want to lose I had had my hands full and my opponent was out looking for fish to fry he had won nine straight victories but I had stopped him in his tracks like a vehicle. I'm wiped out now but I managed to get a draw from the highest rated chess player I have seen. I need a power nap now not later but now.

Remembering The Game

The genius types can remember each and every move of a particular game. Their minds are set up that way. But the grandest set up is the chess playing machines that is how good they are this is nothing new it has been around for quite some time now. My games are not so meticulously recorded but emotionally they can be known written about in detail as best as I can recall and referred to in the future of an appreciation well earned. I didn't get....well wait yes I did get his name it was a rated game on the Yahoo chess games a well regulated online chess game. My point is that yesterday's game was making my heart pound and I thought I was beyond such emotions from an old game.

So You Think Chess Is For Nerds?

Guess again. You're are wrong if you do. Consider the news when a major break through in chess occurs or when a child prodigy emerges beating the experts at the game gaining prominence as the next up and coming grand master in chess. Take a bow to the new born chess king the new kid on the block. I didn't take the game lightly in my last one. The excitement was too much. I might as well been in a SWAT situation in a life or death story rather than the last chess game I played about an hour or less ago. Recuperation was required before I could get a hold of my nerves. I was getting mowed down the first problem was making an error and handing over a pawn. Okay it was just a pawn I could recoup I figured just maybe. I felt some confidence. But I blundered and found out I set myself up which I did by getting out maneuvered losing my bishop where he proceeded to mow down my pawns one by one methodically as I made a one stab long shot chance to coordinate my two rooks for an assassination attempt small chance but worth the while I figured. Magnus currently the number two ranked chess player in the world can calculate nine moves in advance as to what he will do. I'm not going to give anyone first hand advice on that matter because I haven't arrived at that advanced technique of chess play but I could beat a computer when it told me it had three plays or moves locked in and would checkmate me no matter how well I moved to counter. As I was losing pieces I assembled my rooks in place used my king to block an escape route for his king and used my stationary pawn to trap his king as I forced his king with the use of my two rooks to capitulate or check mate his king. It worked. I could not go on to play another second game my nerves were shot my physical and mental energies were depleted and I needed a power nap otherwise I would have fallen on my face just to save my life if the house were on fire.

Smell The Apple Blossoms Forget About The Losing

And such a picture of an apple blossom can help relieve the intense drama and stress of the game too. I would feel this same pressure when I participated in talk shows at times especially when I was a mere inexperienced talk show caller to a major radio station in San Francisco; the guest speaker was Norman Mailer the writer of the century in my opinion and the host was Ronn Owens. Larry Cummins was also listening from afar but I had no ideal until he mentioned my encounter with this talk show discussion on Norman Mailer's new book at the time about Lee Harvey Oswald a potential assassin of JFK. Larry Cummins was one of my coworkers at a major postal facility in the undisclosed city where I worked. It was like I was talking to God Norman Mailer was always the thinker and writer to me when I was growing up a highly respected man with a view. I was in complete awe with shock and in an intense dramatic mode of awareness pretty much like I was in my last game of chess just an exhibition game but this one I did not lose. As dramatic as this chess was it was merely just one game out of the 1266 or so games of chess played since 2009. Today is just another game of chess online an insignificant event but yes what a bang for the buck a game of chess online can do for drama.

Smell The Apple Blossoms Forget About The Losing

This photo I drew from did not come out as well as this photo I took. I do solemnly swear under perjury of oath that this photo is the one I took and it is not a copy right infringement. In fact anyone has my permission to use it not that my permission is required I'm not sure what the law says but anyone using this picture is more like a compliment to me but be known to the public that this photo is an original photo I took it came out looking good how does it look to you? Some of my trace drawings come out looking better than the actual photos I draw from. So what does these pictures have to do with chess? It is merely a good way to get my mind off chess and smell the roses but in this case the apple blossoms. It doesn't take me long to get over the lost of a game or even a chess game slump of successive games lost in a row. I'm living a full life not just in chess.
I do not live for tragedy. Heaven is here right here for me on earth. When it is time for me to leave earth I will figure that out what to do when the time comes or I'll plan it out now before I pass on. It could be thirty years from now however that I will pass on who knows? I know I will ask the search engines! But I am not going to hold my breath on this one.

In winning and losing one must invest a great deal of emotion namely the agony of defeat and the thrill of victory an old saying said for years on the Wide World Of Sports a television series way back in the 60's. It is true not just in sports games but chess games as well for mostly there must be a winner or a loser and an occasional draw. I'd say for most of us none of us like losing and when we don't get our way we can feel in a rather negative way the beast within us is riled to a vast array of emotions anger being one of them. For this gorilla it was either an anger management class or certain death by fire squad unfortunately for him he faced the firing squad.

Marble Chess Board With Matching Pieces

It was out there on display but too good to chance an accident so away it went into safe storage. It's not for sale and there's no money to make in chess to pay for any one's bail and there are too many games in which I fail let me say I'm better off to take a long trip so I will sail before another tough opponent comes along and I get nailed. What I just said makes little sense but if it rhymes then it is good to go.

If I could live among much less clutter and spare the fat and consume far less butter I could take my picture and hear the shutter and live without fear and bad nerves and the shudder you could hear me speak much clearer without the mutter and I wouldn't have to search anymore for words that rhyme with clutter, butter, shutter and mutter and oh yes the other was shudder.

Rereading Chesstigers Comment

This is more for me than anyone else. His comments I do buy the only worth while comment which makes good sense. Right now I'm a physical wreck at this time I cannot walk well and my foot is at a discomfort waiting for my medicines to kick in. But yes Chesstiger makes good sense I would like to memorize his comment and keep it for food for thought for in grasping for an answer when I last lost moments ago I was looking for answers. Notice when I'm close or near or even at a winning streak things sound so upbeat with me. But for now I really don't know I did lose at a few silly games but yes I can blame it on something external. I know what it is what is wrong. I need more of a physical training or more time bicycling when I'm not doing anything else physical

When I See Chess Patterns I See This

The basic elementary moves in chess if played enough will produce patterns as any recreational chess player will tell you. As in chess you want to pick the patterns you have seen in the past that will work for you. The same is true for works of art. You want to see the patterns in the art inherent in a photograph and pick and chose the best lines the best borders with which to drawl. Drawl your conclusions and be the winner. If Magnus Carlsen or chess legend and former acquaintance Walter Browne could see the lines and borders on a computer screen and draw from those lines they would produce masterpieces of art on paper or canvas and Pablo Picasso would roll over the age of computer graphics in art has long been in existence even a beginner like me who could never produce art work can now see the patterns never before seen in my youth. At times I can see the light at the end of the tunnel; the more games I play the better patterns I can see not just in chess but also in art in the form of drawing through tracing. Through tracing we are studying and learning from the masters let us move on toward a greater dynasty!

True Confessions Of A Chess Addict

You can see that I'm involved in an on going battle of mind control. I'm obsessed by chess emotional and totally. I cannot quit. There is the dark side of the game and you can quite clearly see the negativity of this game as it consumes my inner soul and eats up my total being like a cancer. When the telephone rings I will not answer it during a rated game I'm immersed in a game of concentration so compelling that tears often well up in my eyes the pressures to win aggravate me as pain and/or discomfort in my foot is brought on probably by the demands to win and not to suffer from the humiliation of defeat. Death before capitulation and often in games I will fight on to the last man take no prisoners. I've been known to make threats that in my life after I die in a game that I will be back and revenge and retaliation will be bitter sweet. At times I will die by my own sword rather than give up a fight to the finish. Yes I have told you the ugly side the dark side of chess and now you have it. It isn't all fun and games. A seasoned chess player has died a thousand deaths only to be reborn again and I say to parents tell your children not to do as I have done I lived my life in sincere misery in the house of on line chess.

The Addiction

Yes I am an online chess addict and forever reason I cannot get on to my server I get all kinds of reasons but don't understand them. Last night I was speaking with Dr. Bill Wattenberg one of my regular long standing radio talk shows and as I volunteer talk show caller to this news station I was asking him what he knew best about the genius in those he had met. He's about physics his background and well as electrical engineering. I'm getting the what will I do next feeling now that I know I cannot get on to my online chess games of which I've logged on some 1250 games of rated games and no I'm not improving in my rating but the point is that it is entertaining much in the way gambling is for those who go to those casinos and pay through their nose so to speak the price it takes to satisfy their addictions a bargain by no means in my book. Playing on line chess for me is a bargain as it was playing for free. But I am an unknown place I can't get on my server and chess might just have to go into another direction a mistake of mine or computer glitches or malfunctions . Knowing this I'm climbing the walls search for a solution.

Christmas Day The Mental Battles Do Not Cease

Bobby Fischer never crossed my path except he made a name for himself but given the chance if he were alive I'd say yes I'd like to meet him with a few questions as for what questions I'd have for him is unknown I'd have to make my inquiries spontaneous. This is how I make the acquaintances of most of the celebrity types. Nevertheless Bobby Fischer was a loner. Get that? A loner! Of all the strangers or new rated chess players he played and interacted with he was called a loner. So I imagine he ever got few phone calls but no that's impossible after all he was idolized by millions of follows was he not? He was. I only recently called up a chess expert not quite as famous for playing chess. I'll leave it be for now.

Getting Beaten By An Attractive Asian Woman

Chinese women are indeed advancing in the field of chess and making strides. When I'm on a losing streak and feeling depressed this famous actress Zhang Zi Yi comes to my mind like right now and I look at her and my depression isn't as bad. She's a winner and she helps make me forget being a loser very fast. She looks so gorgeous with her hair hanging down. This will sound very strange to you but if an opponent were to beat me badly in chess then it would be my preference to be beaten by someone who looks as attractive like this woman Zhang Zi Yi . Why this is so I do not know maybe it is because they as females of Asian ethnicity have been oppressed for too long of a time and justice beckons for them to be present and counted for in all justification. I'm not even close? Please tell me then.

Yes My Nerves Are Galore Still And Forever

This line for a title isn't new but it does apply to this moments situation having just come off a game. It is said no two chess game can ever be duplicated I think I shall google this saying or statement whether it is true or not. I do know the nervous feeling is the same at times I'm open at various times in a game to be this way. Look at the time. The chess addiction can hit a poor fellow like me at any time at this time is ungodly. It's two thirty in the morning not a creature is stirring only my son's pet hamsters named Emily and Christopher. It is the mouse that doesn't stir during Christmas remember my fellow Christians? I'd like to see the hands of all those Christians out there in blog readership land. Okay so you can't show your hand but you can always make a comment. Make one. Go ahead. Make my day.

But back to the game I just had. There was no caffeine but I was primed with a true yearning to play a game of chess. It's the old chess bug. My opponent's rating was almost the same as mine but I'm playing at those hours in the morning which are not mine usually. And my foot is at a discomfort. I haven't noticed my hand shaking but my wife during various times has noticed although not lately. The blogs written by champion chess players are not all that much different my believe is that too are only human susceptible to human emotions including feeling their nerves at various times eating away at them. Those that tell you they never or rarely get nervous well....what can I say. Are they lying? Whatever you are willing to believe is fine with me. I will tell you the honest truth. This blog testifying in writing on how I get butterflies and nervous is the big lie. I never get nervous and I never lie. Oh my golly gosh. What am I saying? Noticed my language is polished in real online chess they use filters to cover up the obscenities which is a nice feature when going online frankly I don't care to see it myself I like to feel I can rise above it even though I'm not anywhere near championship chess. You would think that there is a filter for this blog for rambling okay I get off here right now for this entry.

It Takes All Kinds The Pieces Of Art

I would always imagine or think up of chess pieces made of solid gold twenty four carets almost solid gold for chess pieces. A solid gold horse was one of the pieces purchased once upon a time. These are the only types of horses I can afford unlike a real horse which cost a ton of expenses for boarding and feeding and so forth. Plastic is the cheapest or most affordable when on the lamb and tight for an expense account. But with plaster of Paris and little of that compound or material packed into those little hollow cavities of those chess pieces you have a do it yourself chess set. These illustrated steel pieces will last a life time plus many other lives if prudently passed along the family lines an heirloom so to speak make mine solid gold. It exists only in my mind it would in all likelihood never happen with me I am not an aristocrat accustomed to expensive jewelry and what not.

Time For The Cat

The domestic cat they can cure depression and no one likes losing more than I do it's the nature of the beast in chess. After all it is widely known now that the cat has replaced the dog as the best bet for human companionship. What else is there to do when in a chess slump or any game slump? Yes like Joe Montana said to me if you hate losing more than you like winning what else is there left to do? He didn't say the latter part to me on the air on a talk show radio KGO 810 about what else is there left to do but I know what he meant. Joe Montana was a win it all the champion in the NFL the legend to the San Francisco Forty Niners and it was he who gave me pointers in winning and losing. Let's get practical. I am on another one of those roller coaster losing streaks and Montana isn't around for me to consult with or compare notes with. It is the day of the cat bring it on to listen to the purr of cat is enough to take my mind off the losing part. Why prey tell do cats have more purring sessions from my very own observations than they do intense yowling and fighting sessions? Is it just my imagination? I distinctly hear and see my private collection of cats as being contented and full of purr not full of agitation and pain and suffering for they the cats are the winners and I may and I will learn from them. If only I can or could play chess like a cat I'd have the whole thing licked!

The Trash Talkers

Sometimes I just will not give up and I pay the price. But this one paid off he kept repeating for me to resign but I plowed on much to all the criticism I get. It really doesn't pay I confess to keep on playing when the odds of turning it around is zero but I did it the game exploded in my opponents face and despite my resolved commitment to silence in a trash talking situation my diction from my deepest silence did utter that this game of a turn around despite virtually no chance to win that this turn around game and my refusal will be remembered a long time from now. You can see at this time in the morning I can barely move or walk and at times only one hand is hitting this keyboard and in my mind I'm all over the place. Look at my sentence structure it should be edited but you should know my struggles are not exaggerated. It is essential to have total concentration to find that zone where no wrong can be made. This is what an online chess addict lives for that rare one time moment to come again. The waiting can take forever and sometimes never at all. But no this morning was not the day of the zone but the day the trash talker got hit with sticky goo and gunk in his face this is a day in the mornings to live by it definitely helps make up for all the bad ones.

Losers Don't Stay Down For Long

Not many of us can score a perfect record most of us are losers there are very few champions that can go undefeated in their career. So most of us will have to deal with losing at one time or another in our lives. If you have been reading my blog of late I can say I found a good piece of chocolate today and I made good use of it. This opponent was roughly the same chess rating as myself a lowly 1102 but wait! He had only one win and more than ten loses. I told my wife I have an excellent chance of beating this opponent and in fact I played him three straight games for ratings until finally I said enough is enough. But he was like a good piece from the chocolate box this was the one guy I could beat especially after seeing his win/lost ratio in his profile I was like a hungry shark looking for a feeding frenzy when I looked up his profile. I figured he wanted to oppose me for three games because you can't get better at chess unless you play opponents better than you; they serve to toughen you up and yes it it harsh and not pleasant when they give you lessons one must learn to absorb the loses and figure out what they did wrong to make a right. I love a good story for this is living life to the fullest hearing and telling the best ones.

Antidepresants For When You Lose

Life is a box of chocolates you never know what you are going to get(a line from Forrest Gump). You could get the wrong one and you never know for sure in most cases unless you are a champion chess player whether you will win or lose. Cats are a good source an antidepressants for when you pick the wrong opponent and you get beaten; cats are a good source to heal your soul they make good companions.

Chinese Women Advance In Chess

My last game I was so nervous I left after the first game I had won my feel for drama was that intense; capitalizing on a second game to win would have been mine had I not been so nervous. I needed to catch my breathe and calm my nerves. Look at this Chinese woman. She is stunningly attractive. She's an actress having starred in the well received movie "Crouching Tiger". I don't know if she plays chess probably not but the point is that Chinese women from China are advancing in the game of chess in quite a fashion it isn't a secret. In a line up of the most attractive Asian women contestants I chose this woman pictured here Zhang Zi Yi now would you not say more people will be playing chess? Checkmate! My opponent I had just played was slightly rated higher than me and we were playing a rated game. With her hair let down she is all the more lovely. She definitely has that aristocratic look about her and she does move around in those circles. Should there be a separation between women and chess? Never!

You Can Play Chess When It Rains

Yes indeed an avid player of chess can do it indoors when it rains which is what is happening right now where I am. I'm in California but I'm not saying where exactly I do like being anonymous golly my mind is going all over the place. Yes I lost a whole series or number of rated games but I gave my opponents something to work for I'll be back I'm not folding and taking on other hobbies not just yet. Yes I get depressed when I lose and I do hate it but if it gets too serious I have Kaiser which can treat depression but this is child's play compared to the bigger sport of which I played and still follow. And that game is tennis. Before word processors were around I use to bang away with the old IBM Selectric typewriter of my adventures in tennis. So writing a blog on chess is nothing new it is inherent within my character. I can't play worth beans when it comes to the competition but I know I can make the game more exciting and out there in the media did not Rocky or Sylvester Stallone make the world of boxing all the more popular with this runaway moves depicting the sport of boxing? Yes he did. And I can do the same for chess let me blog.

My Opponent At Last On The Ropes

And when I reached that pinnacle finally what did I do? Blunder. Do I hear thunder? God should be angry at me for blowing a victory but then again you know why I played an exhibition game I knew I'm not at my best at this time of the morning. Nevertheless it was a heart wrenching finish but he played well he didn't deserve to lose it he fought so hard all the way hanging on to every ray of hope to win not to lose. However my preference was to have won this is the way I feel at the time. Machines have no feelings. Life to humans and animals is all about feelings the human issue cannot be forsaken write it down. I already just did.

Where Oh Where Is My Cat

The fourth straight lost in a row I call that a slump. And the cat isn't around it is gone. Things could be much worst but we won't invite tragedy which is what is in the news each and every day. Bernie Madoff''s son age 42 or so just did himself in now that is tragedy. And as usual a few of the big celebrity people are diagnosed with terminal illnesses. I've known people involved in fatal accidents so losing a bunch of chess games pales to the real news of tragedy or just plain bad news and I shall savor the fact that at the present I'm just having a mere chess slump not an experience of losing my mind and mental health in a real war like many of the Vietnam veterans I have known who came back to civilian life all messed up in their heads from an unpopular war. For this I am grateful I have not experienced that part of life. Yes I could read blogs of war stories but no I don't think so but they are there for anyone interested. I've seen and heard enough war stories from those in combat from the Vietnam war as it is it is time to move on and get on with life as it is.

Cats Can Cure Depression

A bad lost in chess can be cured by a cat yes indeed but I cannot find him he took off but he comes back. I've lost a few in a row now chess should be outlawed for those who are too emotional but I can hack it after all I spent decades since I was an adolescent playing tennis matches and small time tennis tournaments even running into the famed tennis pro Brad Gilbert when he was knee high and coming up in the world of tennis a game far more popular than chess. So I am made of the right stuff when it comes to competing the losing and winning deals. It just goes around and around like a wheel these winning and losing deals. I only ask of God for him or her to deal me his best hand and let me deal with it in the most intelligent way with of course lady luck. Prayer can help it doesn't hurt. I noticed highly skilled chess player whose goal is to reach a chess rating of 2000 has my blog "Nerves Galore" as one of his reading blogs on his list on chess. This is a good thing he must be smart God willing may he go beyond his goal of 2000. I wish him well. My demeanor is not always negative for as my psychology teacher once lectured no one but no one can be happy all the time unless they are crazy.

I noticed a few more of my hand drawn images have been posted when one clicks on images after googling "Nerves Galore". You can then click on those pictures or images and it refers you back to this web site. That's cool. It pleases me. Defeat is not so deafening after all there is a bitter sweet rhythm to this game of chess after all. Despite my loses today life is still good.

Blunder

I showed my blunder instead of the thunder this makes me wonder as I remain from the the top of the hierarchy under. For an early morning game playing a 1345 or so player I didn't too bad except for the blunder or error which almost always loses the game in a tight game it can make the difference and it did from the beginning of the game I hung in there but not quite good enough. At least I got the first part of this entry in a rhyme; chess should be for everybody even the rap artist. I would not mind at all if the popularity of chess shot on upward. Why not? It is something to think about.

Wow!

I did it! At this hour so early and without caffeine! I won! I just had beaten a 1375 or there about a higher rated player and my foot and walking is something else to be desired. I trapped his queen it was so cute. It was an exhibition game but I do mind losing them just as well even though they don't count in the ratings. My opponent made a strategic error not a hand me over error mistake.
This is what we chess players live for the unexpected victory despite all the loses we have suffered. It gives us a ray of hope. For this game at this hour I had beaten the odds even though it wasn't for ratings. My opponent was moving with lightning speed which can be intimidating just as is the opponent who trash talks during a game which is very annoying and distracting but during an online game I've learned; the disable feature of online chess games is a blessing.

You may wonder who this man is. Is he serious? What does Wikipedia say about him? He looks like a space cadet kind of sort of. Is he an astronaut his jacket looks like the kind worn by NASA? This is a blog on chess perhaps he thinks of himself as a story teller on the basics of chess after all he looks like he might have that look of thought inherent in the thinking process. I'd say he looks like he has been around the block more than once. I hope he knows what he is doing because chess is a very serious game you can laugh if you must but there is nothing comical about what is necessary for application for the fundamental workings of a chess game played online. Hold all joke telling sessions and make room for an online game of chess of the more than a thousand games played online this man in an interview has stated he has never played the same player for the most part. New players come lined up with the proper qualifications to train this player preparing him to move it on out and that is no rap.

Yes My Nerves Are Galore Still And Forever

You cannot call me a liar. The higher I go well....I wish I was lying and as I may or may not go up in ratings the effect of falling down from such heights is an expectation but God oh God if only it were not true and I could ascend beyond my most wildest expectation. What is this? I dream the impossible dream and a low life dirt bag scum of the earth of Chinese descent has visions of respectability and a wild eye hope of having his ethnic people rise up to a world class economic power of the highest magnitude? Any such dream is indeed from a wild eye madman any such dreamer should be sent directly to a psychiatrist for a complete mental overhaul.

The last player was not rated that much higher than my ratings but they can beat me with regularity in the mornings without my being under the influence of that dreaded drug known as caffeine. It is not morning now not at all. I hate falling down. No one in their right mind does. Guess what? Football players do it all the time.

Tetering Above My Peak

Do we all do it? I'll go as far as caffeine my only performance enhancing drug without it I'm a goner. As far as the other illegal drugs I know nothing of them count me out of the very few anti caffeine advocates I've enough problems justifying my use of this terrible caffeine drug better if possible to go without any and use one's own genuine powers. Yes I know the real world isn't that simple. Losing the exhibition games isn't so bad when I don't rely on caffeine to pick me up but up at that rating where a boast of caffeine can make the difference. I use to depend on caffeine when playing tennis and it got me there to a height beyond my natural abilities and then there are beliefs that this could lead to serious consequences. What am I going to believe? If it's legal I can go with it. It's been a long time or no time I can remember that anyone called me a goody good two shoes kind of guy but as you can see I am one. I don't like that label so good for me I cannot recall too many people complaining about me being this way. My highest rating was at a temporary 1430 I may never reach a chess rating that high a rating of 1223 is the highest I've been in many months so what can I say? This is a class D rating and would you believe there are ratings as low as a class J? Everyone one has a chess rating whether they play chess or not. What's yours? Having spoken by phone in recent days to chess expert and grandmaster Walter Browne I'd say for me I was ready and willing to make contact with a chess rating somewhere roughly speaking or writing above in excess of 2500 or 2600 a rating of which very few of us will ever see. I attempted to jar his memory as to when and how we became acquainted but I could not expect even an expert chess grandmaster to remember a routine day in 1975 or there about
but don't get me wrong they do have remarkable memories they have to if they are expected to climb so high in rankings and ratings in chess. The news of chess is only of my opinion.

Magnus Carlsen Is An Influence

Magnus Carlsen according to an interview says he isn't discipline plays when he wants to play chess and chooses to do so when he wants. To do what you want when you want sounds good enough to me. If only events could work out that way things would be much simpler. An elder told me instructed me advised me I should never write anything about anyone. This is very good food for thought I shall take this bit of advice very seriously.

Twenty seven on line game of chess rated didn't happen this day. That would be grueling and I'd be living in hell. I did that a number of occasions not many but more often than not. I'd like Magnus Carlsen's approach to chess.

The nerve of me had the gall to call up Walter Browne the great and call him by his full name including....well....I do intend to protect his privacy he trusted me in the beginning when I first met him and certainly I will return the favor. I never did write about or mention much of Walter. It wasn't a dream however we were talking chess more or less and a new game of chess right now would put me into a mess I confess.

The Elite Can Set An Example

Magnus Carlsen should be the one. His philosophy is live and let live. The comments readers list on Magnus must be right on the mark he isn't a normal thinking chess moving player being of the highest level of play even out playing the established chess legends. To sum up his success in becoming a number one ranked chess player is a process of great thought his low key thoughts about himself.

In Chess I Call A Knight A Horse Of Course

The borders of a defined object must not be violated otherwise the rule of thumb is broken the integrity of the picture is ruined but can be corrected. Notice in this picture I drew the coloring which we have done as children must not extend beyond the borders or perimeters if it does the bells and flashing lights go off instantly. An arrest is made you go to jail automatically. Case in point drawing the right way requires sobriety it is that simple. I do wish things were that simple. In my mind there is a direct correlation between drawing and the patterns in chess visualized the more the chess game is played patterns come out as do the patterns when drawing a desired picture I can see the inner workings of the perimeters of a picture. Do you get my drift or are we in a rift? A little poetry takes away the frustrations when logic doesn't play into the picture.

Landscape Under The Twilight

I can explain the preceding image the picture I drew from not a photo but from my imagination truly a work of art if I don't mind this time saying so. The image didn't look like it was going to become part of this blog so I finished by super short explanation of it and ran. Further explanation can be seen here in this day's entry. In chess all or most regular chess players see patterns with which to make a move the more intelligence the player is the higher rating he or she has. A chess game is filled with patterns a player must choose each move contributing toward a movement and the player who can create the best moves forming the best pattern in opposition to his opponent creates the best picture and thus wins the contest. Patterns make up a picture. Yes this is a very awkward explanation in the time to come my explanation will be perfectly clear but you do understand the jest of my main ideal which is a well drawn picture is a derivative of all the chess pieces moved within a chess game. I'll just leave it at that for now.

The Patterns In Chess Is Transferred To Art

Those who play enough chess like myself even at the advanced beginner level can see the patterns in chess to defeat the vast majority of anyone who dares to play.

The Turning Point To Optimism

How can I turn this one down and reject? This is a good one. I probably drew it from a photo it has been awhile since I did. Materials used? I'll be frank it isn't water colors. It's plain old marker pens and I have the nerve to come out and admit to the use of juvenile type instruments? Yes I do have the nerve. It's the only material that works for me. I'm a beginner drawing from the masters and learning to know them. This one isn't bad coming from a beginner like me. You would think Pablo Picasso did this one or Van Gogh the man who starved and remain penniless while painting. I've had my share of poverty and insanity thank you can't you read into it in this blog?

Images

It is a slow day today. The chess game was slow the ratings just fair to mediocre and the new pictures didn't get published. My car is still in the shop and who knows what and when if I will get my car back after so many days of trying to check engine lights and $1300 worth of repairs with more to come and the car was running like new and on and on where we stop nobody knows I think I am punch drunk chess isn't on my mind yet I'm writing in my chess blog. Yet this is indeed a candid story of the times and life of a recreational chess player with of course no fame in sight. I never thought that it would be published but when I'm in a slump negativity makes the mark I'm sorry to say. On line chess isn't for the faint of heart there are mental games of sheer skill required and many skilled players just ready to take a poor unsuspecting soul down and trounce the living dickens into dust and yes I'm way past my prime age wise to think seriously of tournament chess a man simply has to know his .....no I'm not going to say it I'll let old Clint Eastwood say it this is chess not the shoot em up Dirty Harry movies. The new pictures coming in take the edge off the need to win every game played or dire consequences I thank the last chess blog man who commented on my blog he sounds like a team player in my arena. Adding images or pictures to this blog will get me past the negativity of the games I have not won because you see I hated losing but can absorb these loses as lessons if it makes any sense to you my dear reader.

War And Chess

Ever noticed the similarities in war and chess? It has it's parallels. In real war of course it is far worst that is hell. All I know my leg is at a discomfort and I cannot walk with comfort until the medicines kick in and it take away from my concentration a bit or a great deal it depends. Anyhow it wasn't a slaughter I gave a good fight to a higher rated player it was a dog fight as too many of them are. I've insomnia and what my sleep therapist technician told me was to stay clear of this Internet. He wants to see the CPAP machine do the job since he believes this Internet has a grip on me and I am not giving this CPAP the chance to do the job. Read a book he says. All I know is that I'm in a chess slump but I can and will pull out of it as I usually do. But you should see the picture I drew....wow! That trumps a chess slump by far.

Is There A Poet In The House Help!

Aside from chess a good counter balance might be a poet so vastly different from the sheer genius and logic of a chess player a good poet is like a God with chosen words to satisfy the lust of the beast that the game of chess cannot. I'll stop right here what I just said will go down not in infamy but it will go down in fame.

Bump The Slump

Don't laugh if it rhymes it chimes rap music has it's purpose in as much as I've mostly detested rap music. The man who commented last about this blog of late being negative is right it is of late negative because no one likes to be in a slump which looks like where I am. This chess game is one wild roller coaster ride going up and down around and even inside out which is what the modern roller coasters to nowadays; they go inside out and you haven't a clue where up is up and down is down from up. But once I get my hands back on the controls rule will once again be restored this is the natural order of it all. You can be amazed at all the chess blogs that exists you think this is egotistic then read some of the other ones.

I've Been Read

Yes this blog comes on negative it is in the early mornings which aren't my finest hour. I was just writing about these unproductive hours when suddenly I saw someone leaving a comment. You mean I'm not living in total isolation a kind of solitaire ? Someone actually cares to read the mind who has also written It Never Takes A Genius? Gee I know I'm being published but it doesn't mean much to me if no one reads what I've written. Some one commented. It wasn't a very complimentary comment but it's a start. Just you wait until I can get rolling just you wait and then you will see heaven on earth good will to all God created life for everyone and all to enjoy as Joe Osteen the preacher man of a large following says. That's it I need a little more or a lot more of Joel Osteen the man who gives a feel good approach to all of life's situations including improving at the game of chess. I'm not asking for the moon the stars or the sun as ownership all I ask is for there to be a little ray of hope in my chess game oh please God let me pray and let me produce! Gee I think I'm being beside myself and thanks to Chess tiger another blogger all the hell from Belgium of all places. But I like that....chess players from all over the world who have come together for a common cause now all together let us pray and yell CHECKMATE!

It Is All About Nerves

Don't you believe me when I say I don't get nervous anymore. I played two exhibition games because I know I'm not up to par my standard play and true to my feelings I lost two of the exhibition games to lower rated players. Now do I have the nerve to go again for a third straight lost let alone a rated game at this point in time? I don't think so. My confidence is shot like my nerves. A little rest and restoration a healing moment in time will do it. Playing a tune up game lets me gauge myself and tell me where I am. It doesn't look like I'm close to a winning streak.

Grieving

Does one mince words when loving or hating the game of chess? Does one....yes one does a game is a love affair it can go very well as well as become a disaster I'm just taking a road not in want of too high a hill nor too deep a hole just a road with which to plant my feet and when that goes and it's time to die I'll do the same as my mother and join the rest of my family up there in heaven. Don't tell me there is no passion that there is no heaven or no hell. Yes I don't know exactly where this is going this is suppose to be about chess but we humans do grieve we hate to lose and yes it is said I lost my mother a week or so when she died but it isn't so bad she made it man she won that game of life defied the odds and lived to 98 and she told me in person she wanted to live to one hundred just a week or so before she took a turn for the worst. If the quality of her life wasn't good then she said die and die she did. In chess life is also reflected and a Crucifixion in games happen some resign when there is not hope to win while a few go on to live though the quality of life is poor there is no winning but life some believe is precious at any level and death is not for us to choose only God decides. But yes chess is but only a game let me not become so foolish no I'm not grieving over a silly game but yet you know my mother did die. How dare I attempt to compare the two. Disregard today's entry.

Watering Eyes From My Mother's Death?

The game brings it on the tension the emotion the mystery and suspense do all there is to bring on the tears the watering the eyes welling from the contest to see who will win and who will lose it is only a game as we remind ourselves.

Approximately seven days ago or on October 30, 2012 of a Saturday in the time I was closing out a game of chess to win or to lose it was that close down to the wire a phone call came from my sister Corey to inform me of the news my mother had passed on and was I upset that the call was made very early in the morning. Exceptions are made for when it is a call of a passing on of one of the dearly beloved and I was not above these exceptions. But nevertheless I was already wide awake at that time to receive the phone call but it had awakened my wife and for her to learn of my mother's death by phone at those ungodly night/morning hours. My eyes were already welling up from the strain of the chess game but one more log added to the torch on fire wasn't going to phase me one way or another. My welling eyes must have been on double duty. Believe me chess is a game of compassion

watering eyes

My Lyrics Succeeded

That is about it. The rest is a wipe out. I'm tired played poorly lost and feeling bad the hope was gone made silly errors my time was not the good thing is that I do get over my loses in a good time the depression lasts when....the engine search looks for solutions an aid to be sure it finds the way like a guidance positional satellite finds the way and spells it out in plain simple step by step in every detail the way. Even though I failed in my rated games and went down clowning dumb and stupid filled with little or no performance what? What can I say?

At least engine search accepted my lyrics it did not reject my prose or my message so cross my fingers hope to die let any diction come forth to fill my convictions.

Still Too Early?

All I know is that I felt game enough this was a worthy opponent experienced against higher rated players seasoned to beat other 1200 plus players and I was giving him a good game almost whatever had the lead but his momentum in his attack were going well I was unable to regroup or send off an attack despite my superior forces. It was a good game although the cuss word filled my mind in war and peace hell is when heaven waits. No it doesn't make sense to me but then again losing doesn't either. He has his share of losing against the bigger guns as well the bigger guns I duck and run and take cover.

The Worst Hour

It is the ungodly hours in the dead of the morning but the better players let me know there is a further level of skill above that of mine whether I rise up to the occasion is unknown I have no ideal but chances are slim to none I will become a chess champion only in science fiction. It is in the cards as Michael Chang once said if he thought he could be number one ranked when Pete Sampas was ranked number one in tennis. A man has got to know his limitations as Clint Eastwood would say. I ain't going to no championship says Robert H. the author of this blog. But it is within the realm I can rise higher in ratings but then that remains to be seen I've no concrete visions of rising in ratings if it happens through hard work or whatever then let it be. Sing it. Meanwhile let me have my fun too getting beaten isn't going to cut it. The Giants baseball team here in San Francisco sure had a good old time making it to the World Series for the first time in eight years they won the pennant. Now what the hell is a pennant it's been so long since they did like eight years? Isn't that something a woman or man wears around their neck? Pendant is different.

My Finer Hour

It's in the afternoon yet my nerves are anxious my seriousness is on the alert and I don't want to lose this one even if it is only a exhibition game no points won or lost but I do not take these games lightly. Just think how I would be under tournament conditions yet tournaments I have not played don't particularly have plans in playing one either but who will know I will be a much better player playing white if I do play one it is too far off into the distant future for tournament chess games for me if at all.

The Finist Hour Was The Ungodly Hour

Why is this so? Because I was playing well the exhibition games no nerves of steel to have the edge and lesser rated players wanted to play me and I was playing up to par toying around while relaxed playing chess was a change of pace for me this time this morning no sweat no element of threat breathing down my throat in fact I was so far ahead in a game I figured I'd throw my opponent a loop and offer to draw in this game and he/she took the offer why get slaughtered when an offer to accept a draw was offered by me? It made me feel good I felt I did a good deed in lessening his bitterness if any in losing that game. I felt like a humanitarian. And that is not such a bad thing to experience.

Why Do I Do IT?

Not all my battles are loses if they were I'd find another game. Chess is a game short of war for there are battles in each game played and personally speaking I do not like to lose. Like real war chess has become accelerated the practice tools are the chess playing computer or simply put the chess machines that calculate and what human is going to out calculate a chess calculator? Anybody can do it one needs not be a genius to enjoy the game it is all about picking and choosing your opponent. It is for the entertainment value interacting with humans from all around the world having this one element in common with which to communicate with a universal language with a few simple basic rules to follow and a whole new language is there for the taking. Each and every move on the chess board is unique where one player response to the other opponent's move.

Vietnam War Syndrome

When playing in a slump it is like fighting a war to no avail we as Americans could not win a war that was that was not designed to be won. I'm not going to rehash what which has been mentioned over and over again but no one wants to be involved in a quagmire it just not make plain sense. I know why many of the returning American soldiers came back from war all crazy and many insane. But yes this blog isn't about war and peace it is about chess. Clearly a feeling of triumph in winning is good a defeat goes down in infamy not a time to relish. The Chinese backed country of Vietnam was backed by the communist China a land so foreign and not our turf. However we never considered the victor as being the nation of China in war. Yes I am not here to discuss the war the focus is on chess. I lost this round this battle but I shall return and return a victor and no I am not the former General Douglas MacArthur reincarnated. Please allow me to introduce a little humor stoic and stone faces brought on by severe seriousness is a sure way to bring a house down.

Back To The Drawing Board

The Kaiser sleep clinic sleep technician admonished me for keeping these hours look at the time the ungodly hours as he says it is not normal to be up at these hours and he says this is within my control as to my insomnia I may or may not use it as an excuse. All I know is that I'm alive enough to be jarred and filled with revenge from the beating I last took not from being tired as is from being soundly beaten my alertness was enough my absorbed recognition of the game from playing the chess machines is lacking and rusty they helped me before and there was not the humiliation when I did lose to them as there is when I play a human online. A computer chess playing machine as I have done before will help my game it does and it did for Magnus the current number one rated chess champion in the world.

Getting back to the Kaiser technician; he says stay away from the Internet read a book but don't let the Internet cause me to lose sleep it is not healthy he feels to live this kind of life up all night and dosing off by day and by night in frequency. All I know is that I'm bound to find something some point in time to make me feel proud again when it comes you and I will know.

Waiting For The Moment

Now is not the time to further run down my ratings. Why play when the game isn't on practice I say when the charm is on let the hunger build up for the game when the better game is for the taking. It works pretty much for me most if not all of the time. Prevent depression wait for the moment until the bad guys or the bad spirits find another place to go. Life will be more enjoyable.

The Probe

I'm not scoring too well on the preliminaries namely another game which can test how I will perform in chess and that game is a video game. And so it goes. I've gotten myself in a four game losing streak. This is not suppose to happen. The more games I lose in a row the greater the depression I really hate losing more than I like winning. Joe Montana the great quarterback said that original sounding quote to me personally on the air to me. He was the champion of major league proportions while I was not but just a recreational games player. Oh well....sighing. You think that it is my mother drawing closer to her maker or something....anything that is causing this chess slump? It's time to take out the garbage and it's too cool for shorts. I'm going out there with shorts anyhow I'm too lazy to change right now.

The Chess Machines

Magnus is the current number one ranked chess player in the world and he holds the world record for being one of the youngest grand masters at age thirteen. That is young. He will be around out there as a chess celebrity for quite some time. So what am I saying? A chess playing computer machine is a good way to learn how to improve one's chess game that's all. When I did use them more than I do now my chess ratings were higher and at one point the online chess players for a short time said I was no beginner. What many of chess players already know is that a fifty dollar chess machine mass produced can beat a grandmaster at will. Most recently I find the chess playing machines dull and boring a real aid in putting me to sleep in a hurry! Great! A solution to my severe insomnia problems! But seriously thinking my next move is to realize the value of such practice resuming practicing against the chess machines will teach me some of the things what Magnus Carlsen has learned. If I cannot have fun playing chess and win enough games then it will be time to find something else to do. I say let there be more fun I haven't seen nothing yet!

Stand By Sound The Alert

Yes it gets this bad where I have to sound the alert any incoming calls are put on hold until this rated game is over and buried and any emergency calls...well...that's a chance I'll have to take usually the person at my front door is a door to door pesky sales person and my loved ones I tell them to leave a message on the answering machine and I can hear the message as I struggle in my battle if when on an online chess game. My alert is paying total concentration on my ongoing chess game I'm just that way. My last game my magic charm must have been working I made no blunders no errors plus the fact I think I just played a good game my opponent rated higher than I also was more like a player with his back against the wall as I pounded him forcing the play.

Die Hard

The last game was interesting the will the desire to play a game of chess could not elude me despite my plan not to play any chess during a period of a chess slump. Surely twenty seven games in twenty four hours with a chess slump is one of those violations of my plan. Nevertheless I backed off from the marathon type games my makeup isn't suited for the long distance hours of one game after another and I see little advantage in the rigors of those tough hours of play especially when there are more loses than wins. Maybe another time but only if I find it enjoyable or worth my while rather than self torture. I figured I might as well play a higher rated chess player he will more than likely beat me but I figured so what everybody else from those with poor records were killing me why not just another player rated higher than me(1265 rated) at least I know he was favored. A funny thing happened nevertheless. I won and I didn't see it as a fluke.

Slumps Are Made For The Dumps

Don't do it I say. If you keep playing and start losing all the time you are wasting your time who needs to practice losing when the game picks up you can practice winning not the practice for losing. Who needs the depression of losing consistently? When I'm in the zone and winning what more than to keep on playing until fatigue comes in and winning is no more than one quits for the time being waiting for the right time when performing is at an optimum and so I will wait for my chess black outs to subside and my karma says to forward and kick ass you are in the groove so play it that way no one needs to practice at anything when they are so bad.

The Winning Streak Comes And It Goes

It came but dissipated. It slowly descended but as I've been saying all along it normally comes back into swing it always does. If it doesn't then plan B follows which is another activity always follows no matter what I can do no wrong will follow if such an optimistic look on life is ever held dear and to our hearts. Life does go on. I think I was on an eleven winning streak chess statistic the longest to date with more perhaps to come it all depends on the Gods of chess I never said I loved the game it's just a game there are more important things in life than a game of chess. These are words for the wise for those are are far wiser than myself. They will be here to teach me the right ways it is not I who preach as if I were in position to do so. I'm not up on my streak but a three game downward spiral where it stops nobody knows it ought to stop here the controls are at my ready ready or not play another one another time from the lot. Can't you see the poetry in motion and an end to the beast that tries to feast yes a monster cluttered with the grease my mission is to seek peace in winning for the very least.

The Moves Of A 1244 Player

His moves were one I do not have experience with having blocked my black bishop left flank from it's normal course of sacrificing itself plus I was prevented from castling when his queen and bishop came down to knock off my red bishop and threaten my positions with his queen. Normal course of action or moves were altered due to his apparently right and proper moves all regular moves were put on hold innovation was the only thing left or I would be slaughter to the pigs. I tried positioning my king closer to a castling like result or formation but never had the time except move my king closer to my right flank. It's a killer heat wave outside and in the homes without air conditioning further inland. My mind is gone no new chess games for me at this immediate time.

It's A Beautiful Day In The Neighborhood

Mr. Rogers in the television series would sing the lyrics to this song but he has long since died. But after struggling with indigestion and my inability to walk without a struggle has passed I'm in the driver's seat and the sunny days and calm make me glad I'm not caught up in a storm of any magnitude and enjoying the peace and the calm of a lazy afternoon. My last game of chess was not bogus I suppose I was putting the move on a 1234 rated player I normally duck too competitive for me but found myself moving up in ratings after a nine game winning streak please no brag it's just one of those things I've been talking about nothing new just a by product so to speak of an event that was bound to be due.

Threw My Opponent For A Loop

I had him a 1237 higher rated player in an exhibition game beat he knew it I knew it but I offered him a draw and without hesitation he grabbed it why not I say? Expect the unexpected I say without sacrificing yourself. This digital camera is a fun instrument of recording a tool toward pictures in the modern era. There will be other activities besides chess movements. There is more to life than chess much much more to life.

Waiting For The Moment

The moment isn't here although it is insane. For me to play a good game of chess I must be using premium use of my time when I am not tired or on sleeping pills (Melatonin) to win a game I cannot be dozing off my concentration must be with me at the moment of the game from the beginning to the end. It's four in the morning thank you Melatonin I am sleeping right through as you can read writing this blog requires let me say a different level of concentration.

Pacman Gives Green Light

Yes the video game of old but ever present gave me the green light and thus I preceded to play a rated 1173 player in chess always a tough opponent for me higher rated than I at this point but my reflexes and mental alertness passed the pacman test clearly the nap didn't make me groggy this time and into the rated chess game I went. The results? It was a lightning victory opponent signaled no contest awarded me the win after I sniped his queen in a move fast reflex seconds to move game a quick win for me to my delight thus adding to my winning streak and the demise to my agony of past defeats and a breathe of life doom and gloom is never any fun believe you me.

Pacman Says

A could indicator in my performance at rated or unrated chess games is my performance in the video game pacman. If I can't score well to my satisfaction chances are I won't do well at chess so hold off until I can fit the mode and play up to par. The pacman game is a good barometer. I could use all the warning signs as to when to duck and dodge a bad game of chess. I'm waiting for my winning streaks to come back as they normally do and if they don't come back then it is time to find another hobby. Look at the time I took six milligrams of a sleeping pill and I've been up since three or all morning I can't remember. This is not the time to play any games and expect performance.

Excuses

What happens when we feel we are not living up to our potential? Life then doesn't seem to be lived up to the fullest. I don't know about you but I'm trying to put my finger on what makes me fail in winning chess games as much as I am capable of doing. I had my caffeine fix so that isn't it. The heat yes that is it! I'm not a heat thriving kind of guy and the heat makes me groggy and slothful every day tasks take much longer to do like when the weather is cool I can zip through the lawn with a mower but in the heat of the day in a summer it takes so much longer to do. That is it maybe but then I play chess morning noon and night so there goes that excuse out the window. But the engine search suggest to take a break during a slump and that I can do.

One of my other blogs is called It Never Takes A Genius which is another story on how to succeed in life even though we and I are not of the genius rating you don't ever see me with a high rating in chess do you? No of course not but the closer I can reach for higher ratings the happier I become. But for now this is not the case. Wait for me when I'm on a winning streak.

Getting Use To It The Game

So far so good I'm getting use to the on line game after all I've more than eight hundred on line rated games but I never get use to the slumps and driving down my ratings to where it is now. Do my winning streaks also happen to drive up my ratings up to where it should? Yes so far so good it does happen. Give me liberty and then confidence while you are at it dear God. I get less nervous....oh wait a minute hold the phone! The phone cell phone rang I was busy playing the game on line cannot talk while concentrating on a chess game and I was going more insane than I was nervous wondering why I'm on the phone doing errands running the phone to my relative visiting here when I'm in the heat and middle of a chess game playing for ratings. Yes I know it is just a game but in my mind and the mind of the chess world it is a very skilled game measuring up and keeping stride with the advancement of technology. No one or no machine is too smart for the age old game of chess it has stayed the course

An On Line Chess Record Breaker

Do I speak of chess accomplishment like when Bobby Fischer the legend said life is a chess board? I think he played more chess games than I did. Do I dare compare his game to mine? I say lighten up Bobby boy and by the way that is my first name or nick name too. I can't say Bobby Fischer played twenty four games in twenty four hours but today I did just that. Count them it is on record with Yahoo on line chess games the statistics bear it out. I'm not going to provide any more material for you insomniacs who need this blog on tape so you may sleep better at nights. A fee will be forth coming. A game of chess lasts roughly thirty five forty minutes so for a fast game lasting half an hour yes twenty four games can be played in twenty four hours. In case you are wondering what on line chess is like with chess players from around the world here you have it with my provider Yahoo on line chess board games you would think I'm hooked would you not having tallied up more than or nearly nine hundred games of chess in less than two years. No I'm not sloshed after playing a ton of chess in a marathon session of chess games I did not make one spelling error according to my spell checker. Games of on line chess will do these things to a poor soul playing chess morning noon and night.

No Mistakes This Time

The last three games of chess I did remember to click on for a no rate game so in losing my rating didn't plummet like a dive bomber. I know when I'm not going to play well sometimes the feeling is there the confidence is up and I am practicing now whether I am to improve upon my ratings remains to be seen the frustration at times appear that in no way will I gain any headway a no talent player can practice until the moon turns to cheese and his game will go no where sorry for the negative outlook but these are my thoughts. Looking at my Yahoo chess statistics I lost two games out of twenty games and had some three drawls or I had sixteen wins two loses and three or two draws but this time around I do not intend to lose eight games in row and wreck my ratings. For those of you who have insomnia I urge you to read this blog put it on tape and play it back while you struggle to sleep I guarantee you to fall asleep in nothing flat yes sir this is the way of my blog. Look at the time it is insomniac special and I'm wide awake but not at the zone which is where and when I can do no wrong and do anything with ease and be the winner.

A Mistake

It wasn't my intention to play a rated game but I forgot to click on for a non rated game and it cost me a lost in ratings. It's just a game remember? Yet losing depresses me it didn't have to happen I could have waited until my energies were better. But I can get over this depression quickly I normally do and victory will be for the taking in the next games. Yes I do hate losing more than I like winning (Joe Montana the great quarterback of the San Francisco Forty Niners his statement on the air in response to my question).

Blunder

This is the "B" word and is not ordinarily allowed in this blog. But I did blunder and that's when chess players get into trouble. I meant to play an exhibition game but blundered and forgot to click on to an unrated game and so there I was in an arena trapped against my will against a higher rated opponent I always duck and dodge when it comes to playing for ratings but I was stuck back out and lose automatically. My opponent was a solid 1265 rated too high for my comfort I only play those opponents with that kind of rating and higher in exhibition games where if and when I do lose I can say oh well the lost didn't count or reduce my ratings. Anyhow despite my blunder I had beaten my opponent by trying to put my best foot forward with visions of the number ranked chess player Magnus Carlsen who says he can envision a dozen or so moves ahead of time each time he moves. Whatever the case I bungled my way into a rated game and won no this time this blunder did not depress me none the least. I've lost count on the blunders I've made sending me into too many nose dives into the bliss of hell. It is not of my will to allow myself to be crucified I am not God. But I know what torture is. Marty Nemko the career talk show host on KGO radio 810 of San Francisco reminded me chess is just a game. It is a relief to know that.

No Slump Here Please

There's that terrible word and it starts with a letter the letter I cannot say let's not go there but I know for the last several days or so I've not on a losing streak. My video game is an indicator of when not to play rated games a prelude or before any such rated game is to be played in chess going into a game of chess half asleep is likened to attempted suicide and dosing off is suicide allowing one's best chess game to slip and slide crashing down into the bottom of The Grand Canyon. Playing a good game of Pacman can prove that at that time at least I'm scoring and putting numbers on the board satisfactory enough to decide whether I'm game for a gratifying game of chess once I can meet the standards for winning in chess. Think about it long enough and you will know what I'm saying I am merely saying a good player in chess should go into the game in mind of putting the best foot forward. I'm in no condition at the moment to play a rated game of chess when my body says right now "it is nap time folks"!

A Game Within A Game

What's fun in an exhibition game(a game without ratings at stake) played for practice a game within a game can be played. When an opponent has little or no hope for a win the dominant player offers a draw, what is there for the player about to lose do? Take it much to his surprise a player about to lose would go for such an offer I know I have; a draw beats an almost certain death! Rather than winning an exhibition game offering a draw and having it accepted makes me feel better than winning. Is it a show of mercy? Maybe it is maybe not if both parties can go away happy then such a drawl trumps a victory in my mind, this is the feeling.

More Yelling Please Not Enough

My son doesn't hear his father yelling enough with the thrill of victory since of course I understand from Joe Montana the phrase I hate to lose more than I like winning which he commented on the air when I asked him if he felt he had to win when he was behind in a game with minutes sometimes seconds left in the game and my question was what goes on in his head when faced with this pressure of not liking to lose over that of winning. Well I was face with a player an opponent who was talking or chatting as we played the intimidation or distraction did not break my concentration as so often it should not. Whatever the case I pulled a win out for a fifteen point gain rather than a twenty point lost to an opponent close to my ratings. It wound up toe to toe but in the confusion of all the excitement I asked myself if i had any gas left any fuel. I do know right now I could use a good nap. See you!

Bouncing Back From The Little Big Dip

I thought you might like that phrase it is kind of catchy. The big dip sounds like an economic dooms day in history will it is true if you consider life as a chess board. No big dips allowed here let alone even a little dip. If only I could have my way. The technique of taking a break following a series of loses may be working as it is like breaking up the rhythm of a downward spiral and getting a grip upon myself from falling into a bad situation namely a slump. I do play better in the afternoons with a caffeine pill or two and rested up feeling ready willing and able and no not like I thought where one had to refrain from....never mind. I know what I mean one day I'll tell.

The Offer For Mercy

When clearly leading the seemingly winner to be offers to draw or offers a tie to be the final result of the game which is a mercy offer both parties can go about their merry way the dominant player needs not to prove anything but a showing of compassion or mercy to end the game unless the underdog wishes to fight on a battle which has little hope amidst the battle worn fight. Tell me this isn't adventure. Being close to having an off my winning streak ways I've elected to play a few non rated games my exhibition games for the practice but also to do well if I can without the risk of running down my chess ratings and suffering this depression as a result. No one likes to lose just as no one seeks out depression only a sick little mind would elect or desire depression.

No Foul Language Here

My blog no matter what the news must maintain standards as frustrating the loses can be. A polished blog on check makes a statement as if to say there is pride in this activity defeat can be overshadowed by victory and if there is not enough victory another activity of worth is always around chess is not the only game around maybe for Bobby Fischer it was but not for me. He was good it was all he had to make a mark in this world of chess the Bobby man fishing for a win and now you know why he was called the Fischer man oh please that was clever a pun made by a recreational writer who writes the stories for fun. If Jesus Christ preached without having to file a tax form or in other words worked at teaching others the religion of his choice or mind then let me have my fun. Instead of going off and seeking to gain revenge after a loss blindly I must regroup and think things through the blind rage is just that a vengeance filled with emotion without intelligence or logic confidence rather than blind rage for victory is seldom a winning way. Reading quotations from Bobby Fischer is very entertaining if not inspirational. It is about the game of chess.

Can't Get No Satisfaction

And it wasn't fun either but I saved the downfall of a plummeting chess rating by playing games for no ratings. Therefore I've saved what I can salvage of a 1213 or whatever number it is from falling from a needless slump of like numerous lost games under a ratings games kind of thing.
I will play rated games when I know my best games are ahead of me.

In The Zone Not A Everyday Occurance

As up for a game in my prime time hour of the later day of afternoon being in the zone did not happen but I did luck out got a free be when my opponent in the second game opted out and abandoned the game in the early second quarter giving me back the points I lost in the first game. It is just a game tragedy does not pend on these games please remember that Bob. I'm talking to myself I'm just plain nuts. And this engine search give me responses I talk to it and I can get positive feedback. But I did not play rated games one after another in the mornings and I did not lose eight games in a row. The change up did my ego better even though the practice time is less I don't mind not driving down my ratings down to the depths of a depth so low a deep sea explorer diver cannot find it.

I Took On A 1450 Rated Player!

It is an ungodly hour at three in the morning and the good news is that I had just beaten a much higher rated player than I fair and square neither of us made blunders we just went toe to toe at it and I a lowly 1178 rated player crushed my opponent played him with my strength forced him into submission and took him on when he challenged me I took him on because I had nothing to lose everything to gain don't like playing the long shot players unless it is for practice and no points are involved I'm confusing you sorry but chess is a very dicey manner of way superstition or favorite options are our ways. My concentration was okay good enough relaxed enough the coffee did me fine otherwise I would have lost caffeine or coffee is my performance enhancing drug it gets me there sometimes. I'm smiling a big one now. This game was mine I had my name written all over it I know somewhere in my mind there is capability to improve at this chess game that is if I choose to make this game fun and systems all point to go. Doom and gloom go away never come back and never stay just let me go forward and have my happy way look my hair doesn't even look gray. I'm fading out now the rated games come later when I'm fully awake

Morning Into The Noon And Night

These are the times my practice times are done the past few weeks or so I may be way off but to the best of my knowledge these are the times. The difference is these games are for real not exhibition games but games that count for ratings. If I can improve some then the ratings naturally will go up the proof is in the numbers. It seems like I've been playing these games forever and I have pretty much without the benefit of seeing my ratings going anywhere but down. It shouldn't be this way. I'm at a ridiculously low rating of 1171 very low for me. I'm tired which is a good way to drop the ratings playing chess while tired that will get a poor soul in plenty of trouble. A power nap is in short order I'm already there.

Rated Games Galore

It's no longer nerves so much as it is being callous to my approach to the game having plowed into these chess games head first without regard to the cost of expending points mostly lost than gained. Instead of improving I'm getting worst despite the extra time and effort I'm putting in so far. Why is that? I will investigate after all the purpose is to have fun not to play to lose and get depress.

If It Isn't Fun Anymore Quit

I am quitting. I'm wiped out. It was a six game in a row slump I can do no right waiting for the session where I can do no wrong. Plus my leg left one is at that discomfort stage not a good indicator for a good game of chess. I'm speechless no speeches for this bad news. Oh the good news is that it is just a game. I'm glad to know that. It is the ungodly hour of the morning I was up all morning into the dead of night not my finest hours but I was being kept busy however no primal yelling and fist pumping for victory all last night that will have to come around another time and it will....next time.

There is some popularity of rap why not I really hated it but I can imitate it as it is a good omen like it or not. Yes that last line was pretty wordy my hope and dreams for a Pulitzer prize for literature is out the door.

Anyhow don't you show me no pity living in the city getting down and feeling gritty I'm not looking so pretty the talk of the riots is among us don't read into my next word there is no meaning to the word ditty I just used it because it rhymes don't tell me I'm not trying to be witty.
The last game of chess was played I'm now out to pasture in a fade there is no king or a queen not even a pawn just look out for the riot the cops are ready to raid.

Ratings Go See And Saw The See Saw Syndrome

That was a mouthful of a title. The journal of an online chess player who could see no further in competition than the ratings of a beginner yes that is putting it bluntly. I'll maybe just maybe pull out of a slump for a weak minded winning streak win a few good games rating around 1229 or even beat a 1400 player fair and square on a skilled level and not just by luck all the time. It's better to listen to the news now I'm reiterating Joe Montana I hate to lose more than I like winning so why am I playing this game? It's a game of life I suppose it has drama and the joy of winning and the sorrow of losing it can be that simple. The last two losing games cost me plenty in points losing to lower rating players. It is a see your ratings sawed into smaller numbers you see it only for it later for it to become the see saw syndrome. It is the highs and the lows no one stays on top of the high forever unless one is crazy.

The New Kid On The Block

It isn't funny. The new kid on the block can be the hip hop man of all talent of the block the test is on line the games play I don't take them lightly they are waiting to go off on me torture me and shed my game into dust. It's very competitive you should see what happen to me when I was naive and stumbled into a 1600 player a rare sight for me to see having come from few if far between chess players. I was creamed, blown away, devastated, crushed and destroyed by an unsuspected ringer skilled in chess I have never seen and yes I will name names his name is Edgar Mapoy. I felt horrible after having been beaten up in chess as if I was hit by a train and lived to feel the pain. The provisional player are the kind I normally like to play right away without hesitating since they are rookies some quite excellent players but many are rookies and new without experience. To make a long story short I blew him away I hope he's okay I'm not callous although it is easy to be this way. Competition in chess can be brutal.

Let The Games Begin

The worst slump to date known as latter day June slump made me look silly and down on my rump take a doctor's hammer and tap my reflexes no need for a thump I've enough problems with my walk I'd like to be younger with a jump no need for a head bump cash is preferred payable in a lump otherwise I'd be down in the dumps as sick as a dog with the mumps.

In other words the games may commence the slump cannot so far cause me to quit I will continue to play I must never forsake my whit it is not my job to report from the bottom of a pit look if you want me I'll go to law school to further explain a writ I'm just talking yes yes take my......

Busted!

I bragged the bubble broke the winning streak shattered. Oh well I keep telling you the mornings aren't mine. My opponent didn't blunder neither did I to my knowledge it wound up a drawl and because he was lower rated I lost ten points. The day isn't over it has only begun. Opponent has nothing but a losing track record rated 1010 or there about he doesn't beat anyone of significance yet my game was too weak to do anything at this time in the morning.....too too bad.

Playing The Rated Games

It is now so common no need to hide behind the Exhibition Games anymore of late I've been playing so many rated games per day I'm getting so use to them that nerves galore is a feeling of yesterdays a moment of history. Times have changed maybe a new name for my blog should take place like Winning Galore or some good name for a chess blog. Please no brag I know this isn't good for things do come crashing down when bragging and we don't need this do we now? Of course not. It's also true that there is no need for a loser and a drunken boozer trapped in the body of an alleged chess player what we need is results for a change up!

The Winning Streak

I hate it when this winning streak bursts. It need not have to happen. Then a kind of depression moves in this is quite unfortunate and it does not need to happen. There ought to be a law against this type of practice. And it is a perfectly good waste of time seeing all the hard work come crashing down in a furry of this downward spiral called the slump. Pray with me a little prayer as I do when the game is in the verge of a let down owed to the bad guys namely the opponent.

It's All An Act

Another day in a slump. Nothing works too many loses. Drama didn't escape. But even while losing many games I was able to play act impersonating a Japanese soldier during a losing battle to the last man refusing to resign but in the end drawing my dagger in my final moments saying death before dishonor my life will end here but in my next life it will be better. This is classic Japanese military custom when nothing short of defeat is acceptable death is preferred over dishonor and so I my little sword act but my opponent could only watch my words probably in disbelief. Let the games begin and let them end. A poor soul can get carried away too easily playing these silly games don't you think mate? Check mate!

Up All Night The UnGodly Hours

Some people just don't like chess period. Yes it is just a game the roller coaster ride it is you get high when you win some good ones and you go down for a drop when the bad loses take you for a loop. I wasn't worried about any insomnia I just played my heart out without any caffeine or any stimulant winning two games losing two and drawing a game all in all it was entertaining I got my money's worth of entertainment.

I'm using this mouse which attaches to this new laptop Mac Book which is remarkably an improvement now I can't cry how slow I am in comparison to what I was before this new mouse runs the game much faster probably accounting for my being awake all night all morning long playing with this new mouse son and wife got me for father's day it even makes up for the hate letter and obscene phone call I received yesterday. And this mouse is affordable it didn't take an arm and a leg! What else will the Chinese manufacture?

Oh My God

I won! The odds were against me this player was the kind of player I would duck and run for cover choosing the lower rated players for a better shot of winning. No one wanted to play me anymore as I waited and long time for a player to come along so I chose this higher rated player just to get in a game but I knew doom and gloom was lurking after the game was over. He had me against the ropes as we went toe to toe eye ball to eye ball down the stretch my back to the ropes getting a pounding and a beating I was desperate and looking around for mercy from this beating and torture until this fantasy I had about my queen and bishop working in unison to defray the onslaught of the opposing queen. To make a long story short trickery of some sort of miracle I drew my dagger from beneath my belt and swung with a thrust into the heart of my opponent just as he was about to chop my head off and my opponent was slayed check mated to my stunning disbelief I assassinated his queen by checking his king and his queen with my queen if he saw it he would have captured my queen with his but he didn't see it coming he must have been blinded by the excitement and confusion of the game. We chess players live for this day and life does go on for me at least today.

Is It Over?

The slump is it over? It always comes back if you believe it then welcome to the gates of hell the nightmare is part of life a counter balance to the heavens heaven on earth must be matched with the hell part too. In my wild eye fantasy I will be the new ruler and new Emperor of all of China a new world to be a world of shiny super world structure a superpower of all nations glorified...oh sorry I must be losing it again just having a fit of delusions don't mind me. It Never Takes A Genius is my other blog which explains how it is okay not to be a high achiever a full and happy life does not necessarily mean you have to be a star or a celebrity or even accomplished. Marty Nemko the brain and the career guidance radio talk show host planted these seeds in my mind. Just be what you can be is what he meant I think. I got smeared by a low rated 1200 player but yes sir not to worry it is only a game from the mind and words of Marty Nemko true words of wisdom I say.

No Tunes No Game

The tunes I tried to play on my musical keyboard now and yesterday wasn't working for me. For one reason or another as I mentioned last Monday several days ago or less I wrote of the tunes if they could be played reasonable to my satisfaction/gratification then my chess game results would match. But it will come around soon I'd say.

Doomed

Trying to concentrate on a full stomach after a regular dinner doesn't cut it. Roberta Duran did that in a major prize boxing match in the epic match against Sugar Ray Leonard only to throw in the towel in the early rounds exclaiming he had eaten a steak before the match and was too bloated to move and fight. And then there was this wife of mine yelling and screaming at her sister Tracy for calling at the house all the time and pestering her. This can spoil a poor fellow in his concentration in a game of chess. Chalk up a lost the game was doomed from the get go next game. I had hoped for a seven or six game winning streak one of my all time highs but no it was not to happen this night.